An Answer to an Age-Old Question

I was sitting in class yesterday when I realized that I was chewing some gum. That got me thinking. You know when you take out a pack of gum and someone else sees it? They get that look like "I just realized that my breath stinks too and could really use some gum". If you see them with that look on their face, you are pretty much obligated to help them out.

Now, the question I came up with was this: Why is it that when there is only one piece left that the other person is like "Oh no, don't worry about it. I don't want to take your last piece". They are so apologetic if you actually do give them the piece. Now, suppose there are only two pieces left. You know that the person is going to be more than happy to take one of them. What makes two pieces so much different than one piece? In the end, you are left with half of what you originally had (not really for me since I tear each piece of gum in three - it makes the pack last longer and the pieces a more manageable size).

At what point should the person asking for a piece of gum truly not feel bad about taking a piece? I maintain that leaving someone with only one piece of gum is analogous to taking their final piece. But what if there are three pieces left? It seems a little more reasonable. I would argue that the figure should be five. When there are five pieces left, the person requesting the gum should not feel bad about taking a full piece of gum. Why five you may ask? Well, there are five fingers on a hand, five toes on a foot and 5 work days in the week. Additionally, five starts with an "F" as does von Frinkenhagen (I know some of you smart alecks are going to say "It starts with a "v". However, "von" is an article of speech. Think of it as equivalent to "the". In fact, from now on, I am Brian the Frinkenhagen).

Continuing on, I have lived in the UK for 5 years of my life. Five wins would make any Aggie season a successful one. Hayley and I are both 26 years old. If you add our ages together, you come to 52 (which starts with a five). Further, if you add the digits together (i.e. 2+6+2+6), you come to 16. Then, if you subtract the 6 from the 1 (i.e. 1-6), you get -5. The absolute value of -5 is in fact 5.

Basically, all indicators point to this magic number. Why tempt fate and determine that another number is more supreme in the gum requesting world? Just don't do it! If you are ever in the position where you are asking someone for some gum, ask them to count the number of pieces they have left. Think of it like poker; before you put someone all in, you ask how many chips they have. You don't want to look stupid by saying "I put you all in" only for them to tell you that they have more chips than you do (not that I've ever done that...).