The Champ

I gotta say: it's been a rough couple weeks. Tax busy season is here and is only going to get worse. School has really picked up with my first paper assigned and due in three weeks time. How I'm going to do the research and complete it in a passing manner is beyond my comprehension right now. The days seem to fly by with each providing less and less substance. The highlight of my day, of course, is getting to go home and see my little baby girl. Sure she's a huge distraction that completely demotivates me from wanting to study. And believe me, there have been too many nights were I have not done my reading assignments. But honestly, how could you possibly want to read legal cases when you could spend time with something so precious?

Today was slightly different from the past couple weeks. Being the nerd that I am, I like to think of today like most of the legal cases that I read: it looks almost exactly the same as every other day, but it's got the most subtle of differences. Here are the similarities: I rushed to get out the door to get to work early; I was busy as hell at work and the individuals that were supposed to be helping me out were booked on other engagements; and school was...school.

But here's the subtle difference: I was in a good mood most of the day (aside - it's sad that it's a rarity that I'm in a good mood. It just didn't used to be like this). What I failed to tell you is that while I had to rush out the door this morning because I woke up late (being 5:55 AM instead of 5 AM), I did so knowing that Hayley and Kaylynn were coming to meet me for lunch.

And then I got my big break on the drive to the bus stop.

After weeks of trying to call into the radio station, I finally got in. You see, if any of you folks listen to 94.5 The Buzz in the morning around 6:20 or so, you already know that they play a game called the "Fresh Out of Bed Head to Head". For those of you that don't listen, you may be asking "Just what in the Jack Billy Frick Crapstain are you talking about Brian?". Well, it's a "quiz" game. Basically, the DJ has two people on the line. He reads a question and the first person to shout out his/her name gets the first chance to answer the question. If you get two questions right, you win a prize.

Now, I have been wanting to play this game for a while. You may be thinking that it's for the prizes. You're wrong. You see, when you win the game, you get to do a "victory speech". Granted the victory speech is a template that the DJ feeds to you, but still, you get to insert your name and all that jazz. Not only that, but EVERY victory speech ends in the same word. Yes, I'll tell you what it is in a minute, but just hold your horses. I don't know what it is about the whole thing, but I find the victory speech very amusing. I told Hayley last week that I really wanted to play (and win) simply because I wanted to give the victory speech.

Today was my big day everyone and I got to play. Not only that, but I won my head to head match up and gave that oh so special victory speech. Let me just warn you in advance that you aren't going to be amused by it and you are going to wonder just what has happened to me. What has gone so wrong in my head that the phrase listed below is so amusing to me? I can't give you an answer but all I know is that when I think about saying it, I just smile. Sometimes I giggle.

With that said, let me present to you my victory speech. Just remember what I said. It's a template. It was fed to me by the DJ.

"Good morning everyone, this is Big B Brian, your Fresh Out of Bed Head to Head one day champion. First time playing EVER! Join me tomorrow on Free Beer Friday as I go for the naughty stuff and win number two, you b*tches!"

And in case you didn't pick this up, I am on tomorrow morning again to defend my crown. Prizes be damned. I just want to make another victory speech!