Alternatives

Things I’d rather be doing instead of sitting in this class:

1. Poking my eye out.
2. Cleaning up dog feces.
3. Changing baby diapers.
4. Working on putting the bathroom back together.
5. Getting hit in the kneecaps with a baseball bat.
6. Cleaning out a post-hurricane refrigerator/freezer.
7. Working 14 hour days during busy season.
8. Chopping off my pinkie finger.
9. Listening to political debates.
10. Trying to convince myself that politicians are capable of telling the truth.
11. Mowing the lawn.
12. Flying on a 12 hour flight.
13. Golfing.
14. Getting kicked in the nuts.
15. Learning about torts.
16. Shoveling 4 feet of snow.
17. Jumping into a half frozen lake.
18. Cleaning out a hog trap that contains a (dead) hog that has been present in it for at least 2 weeks.
19. Standing on a ladder during a hurricane/tropical storm trying to fix the satellite dish to be able to watch football.
20. Wax my entire (yes, my entire) body.
21. Run with the bulls in Spain.
22. Bungee jump.
23. Sky dive.
24. Fall into a volcano.
25. Swim in the ocean where human eating animals are present (i.e. sharks, whales, etc.).
26. Pick up a spider.
27. Pick up 2 spiders.
28. Pick up a spider and all of its babies.
29. Pick up 2 spiders and all of their babies.
30. Smoke a cigarette.
31. Kiss someone that smokes cigarettes.
32. Eat dog food.
33. Eat vegetables.
34. Socialize on Facebook for 8 hours straight.
35. Watch figure skating in the Olympics.
36. Go to an opera.
37. Sneak into Iran and try to give Mahmoud Amaninejad (not sure how to spell his name and don’t really care how to spell his name).
38. Attempt to understand Hugo Chavez.
39. Try to figure out how the Texas courts are set up.
40. Research for the paper that I am going to have to write (soon!).
41. Give myself a papercut on the side of my mouth.
42. Listen to Mac and PC users argue over the superior computer/software platform.
43. Drink milk that is past its expiration date.
44. Eat food that is past its expiration date.

This list could (and should) go on and on and on and on and on and on and on...